In a shocking turn of events, a Harvard professor has come forward with a bold claim about the recent resignation of Claudine Gay, the Dean of the Faculty of Arts and Sciences. According to Professor Ignatius P. Brainiac, Gay was not forced out by any political or administrative pressure, but rather by an angry mob of math nerds.
Yes, you read that right. Apparently, a group of disgruntled mathematicians, armed with calculators and protractors, stormed Gay's office and demanded her immediate resignation. The reason? They were fed up with her lack of appreciation for the beauty of numbers and her refusal to include more math-related courses in the curriculum.
Professor Brainiac, a self-proclaimed expert in the field of math nerd psychology, explained that these math enthusiasts felt marginalized and ignored by Gay's focus on other disciplines. "They were tired of being treated like second-class nerds," he said. "They wanted to rise up and defend the honor of mathematics."
According to eyewitness accounts, the mob of math nerds chanted equations and waved graphs as they advanced towards Gay's office. Some even brandished pocket protectors as a show of solidarity. It was a sight to behold, a convergence of brains and passion rarely seen outside of a calculus class.
As news of the incident spread, the academic community was left in a state of disbelief. How could a group of math nerds have such power and influence? Are they secretly plotting to take over the world, one quadratic equation at a time?
Of course, not everyone is convinced by Professor Brainiac's theory. Critics argue that it is simply preposterous to believe that a group of math nerds could have orchestrated the downfall of a respected academic figure like Claudine Gay. They point to more plausible explanations, such as internal power struggles or disagreements over policy decisions.
But Professor Brainiac remains steadfast in his belief. He insists that this incident should serve as a wake-up call to the academic community to pay more attention to the needs and desires of math nerds everywhere. "They may be socially awkward and obsessed with prime numbers, but they deserve our respect and admiration," he declared.
As for Claudine Gay, she has yet to comment on the matter. Perhaps she is still recovering from the shock of being brought down by an angry mob of math nerds. Or maybe she's just busy calculating the probability of this article being taken seriously.
