Aliens cite US debt crisis as reason for not taking over Earth
In a shocking turn of events, extraterrestrial beings have come forward to declare that they will not take over the planet Earth until the United States resolves its debt ceiling crisis. The aliens, who have been communicating with various governments around the world for years, have reportedly grown tired of waiting for the US to get its financial house in order. "We've been monitoring the situation for some time now, and we just can't justify taking over a planet that can't even manage its own finances," said Zog, leader of the alien delegation. "We're not saying we won't take over in the future, but until the US resolves its debt ceiling crisis, we're going to have to put our plans on hold." The news of the aliens' decision has sent shockwaves through the international community, with many wondering just what it will take to get the US back on track. Some have suggested that maybe the threat of an alien invasion will be the wake-up call that the US needs to get its finances in order. Meanwhile, in Florida, Governor Ron Swanson has stirred up controversy once again with his latest remarks about pardoning those involved in the January 6th insurrection at the US Capitol. Swanson, who has been a vocal supporter of former President Trump, has faced widespread criticism for his comments, with many accusing him of trying to rewrite history. But the Governor remains unapologetic, insisting that his actions are in the best interest of the people of Florida. "Look, I'm not saying that what happened on January 6th was right," he said. "But I am saying that we need to move on and focus on the future. Pardoning those involved would be a good first step towards healing the country." As for the aliens, they have made it clear that they will continue to monitor the situation and will not hesitate to take action if they feel that the US is putting the planet in danger. Until then, they will be keeping a close eye on the debt ceiling negotiations and hoping for a quick resolution.
