In a shocking turn of events, President Donald Grump has declared war on the weather, specifically targeting storms for their negative reporting on him. In a recent tweet, Grump ranted about how hurricanes and tornadoes were unfairly portraying him in a bad light, and demanded that they stop their negative coverage immediately.
Grump's latest executive order, dubbed the "Sunshine and Rainbows Act," instructs all storms to only report positive news about him, such as his excellent golf swing and his ability to drink water with one hand. Any storm caught disobeying this order will face severe consequences, including being downgraded to a mere drizzle or a light breeze.
Weather experts and meteorologists were left scratching their heads at Grump's bizarre directive, with many wondering how exactly he planned to enforce such a ridiculous demand. Some speculated that Grump might try to build a giant wall to keep out negative storms, while others suggested that he might just declare victory over the weather and move on to his next target.
Meanwhile, the storms themselves seemed unfazed by Grump's threats, continuing to wreak havoc and destruction wherever they pleased. Hurricane Katrina was reportedly overheard laughing at Grump's tweet, while tornadoes in the Midwest were seen high-fiving each other in celebration of their newfound notoriety.
As the weather continues to ignore Grump's demands, the president has reportedly begun looking into other ways to control the elements, including hiring a team of loyal clouds and raindrops to do his bidding. Only time will tell if Grump's war on weather will be a success, or if he'll end up getting caught in his own political storm of controversy.
