Florida Man Claims Responsibility for Moscow Targeting, Cites Drone Attack Training in Backyard

In a bizarre turn of events, a Florida man has come forward to claim responsibility for the recent targeting of Moscow, citing his extensive drone attack training in his own backyard. The self-proclaimed mastermind behind the attack, who wishes to remain anonymous, insists that his suburban neighborhood was the perfect setting to hone his skills.

According to the Florida man, his fascination with drones began when he received a remote-controlled helicopter as a Christmas gift. Little did he know that this innocent present would spark a passion for aerial mischief that would eventually lead him to target one of the world's most powerful cities.

Neighbors recall seeing the Florida man spending countless hours in his backyard, perfecting his drone piloting skills. From flying through hoops to performing daring stunts, he spared no effort in becoming a true drone virtuoso. Little did they know that these seemingly innocent activities were just the beginning of a grand plan.

When asked about his motivations, the Florida man explained that he was simply tired of the mundane suburban life and sought to inject some excitement into his existence. "I mean, how many times can you mow your lawn before it becomes mind-numbingly dull?" he exclaimed. "I needed a challenge, something to get my adrenaline pumping."

His solution? Targeting Moscow with his trusty drone. The Florida man claims that he meticulously planned the attack, studying maps and learning about the city's key landmarks. He even went as far as watching countless spy movies to ensure his plan was foolproof. "I wanted to make sure I hit the right targets, you know? No point in wasting all that training for nothing," he said with a mischievous grin.

Although the Florida man's actions may seem outrageous to most, he insists that he never intended to cause any harm. "It was all just a bit of fun, really," he stated. "I never thought anyone would take it seriously. I mean, who could have predicted this level of chaos?"

Authorities are currently investigating the Florida man's claims and are working to determine the extent of his involvement. In the meantime, the incident serves as a stark reminder that even the most ordinary of individuals can harbor extraordinary ambitions.

So, the next time you see your neighbor practicing with a remote-controlled toy in their backyard, be sure to keep an eye out. Who knows what grand plans they may be hatching?