In a shocking turn of events, a local man has declared war on his neighbor's collection of lawn gnomes, citing them as a threat to his sanity and aesthetic sensibilities. Armed with nothing but a trusty super soaker, he hopes to launch a counteroffensive that will rid his neighborhood of the pesky ceramic creatures once and for all.
Neighbors were taken aback by the man's sudden aggression towards the innocent lawn ornaments, with one resident commenting, "I always thought those gnomes added a touch of whimsy to the neighborhood. I never imagined they would be the cause of a full-blown water gun war."
The man, who wishes to remain anonymous for fear of retaliation from the gnome-loving community, has been spotted sneaking around his neighbor's yard under the cover of darkness, armed with his super soaker and a determined glint in his eye.
When asked about his unconventional choice of weapon, the man explained, "I figured if I'm going to take on an army of gnomes, I might as well do it in style. Plus, I heard super soakers are great for precision targeting."
As the battle rages on, the neighborhood is divided between those who support the man's quest for a gnome-free environment and those who believe he has gone off the deep end. One thing is for certain - this war on lawn gnomes is far from over, and the super soakers are only just the beginning of what promises to be a long and absurd conflict.
