President Biden's latest proposal to solve the debt ceiling crisis
In a surprise move, President Biden has announced a new plan to collect the souls of American college students in order to pay off the national debt. The plan, which has been met with both outrage and confusion, would require all current and former students to sign a contract agreeing to forfeit their soul to the government in exchange for the forgiveness of their student loan debt. According to sources close to the administration, the plan has already been dubbed the 'Soul for Debt' initiative and is being hailed as a creative solution to a long-standing problem. 'We understand that this is a bold move,' said a White House spokesperson, 'but desperate times call for desperate measures. We believe that this is the best way to get our country back on track financially.' However, not everyone is on board with the proposal. Student advocacy groups have already begun to speak out against the plan, calling it 'morally bankrupt' and 'unconstitutional.' 'The government cannot just take our souls,' said one student protester. 'This is a violation of our human rights.' Despite the opposition, the Biden administration is pushing forward with the plan and is expected to present it to Congress next week. If passed, the 'Soul for Debt' initiative could potentially wipe out trillions of dollars in student loan debt and help to avert a financial crisis in the United States. Critics of the plan say that it raises serious ethical questions and could have unforeseen consequences. 'What happens to these souls once they are collected?' asked one commentator. 'Do they go to heaven or hell? And who gets to decide?' Only time will tell whether or not Biden's latest plan will be successful. For now, it remains a controversial and divisive issue that is sure to spark debate for years to come.
