In a shocking turn of events, the Supreme Court has recently ruled on affirmative action, and it seems that chaos is about to ensue among Asian Americans with the unfortunate name of Kim Jong-un. Yes, you heard that right. If your parents had the audacity to name you Kim Jong-un and you happen to be of Asian descent, get ready for pandemonium.
It's no secret that affirmative action has been a controversial topic for years. The idea of giving certain groups a leg up in the college admissions process has always sparked heated debates. But now, with this new ruling, it seems that Asian Americans named Kim Jong-un are going to be caught in the crossfire.
Picture this: a young Asian American named Kim Jong-un applies to college. With excellent grades, extracurricular activities, and glowing letters of recommendation, Kim Jong-un is the ideal candidate. However, due to the Supreme Court ruling, colleges may now be forced to reject Kim Jong-un's application simply because of his name.
Can you imagine the frustration? The confusion? The sheer absurdity of it all? Poor Kim Jong-un, who had nothing to do with North Korean politics, is now being penalized for a name he didn't even choose. It's like being punished for a crime you didn't commit, only in this case, the crime is having a name that happens to be associated with a notorious dictator.
But let's not forget the real victims here: the college admissions officers. They now have the unenviable task of sifting through countless applications, trying to determine which Kim Jong-un is the genuine applicant and which one is just a poor soul caught in the wrong name. Talk about a bureaucratic nightmare!
And what about the other Asian Americans with more common names like Kim or Jong? Are they safe from this pandemonium? Or will colleges now view all Asian applicants with suspicion, wondering if they too are secretly plotting to take over the world?
It's clear that this Supreme Court ruling has opened up a whole can of worms. The unintended consequences are far-reaching and downright comical. Perhaps it's time for colleges to start implementing a new policy: judging applicants based on their merits rather than their names. Just a thought.
So, if you happen to be an Asian American named Kim Jong-un, brace yourself. The college admissions process just got a whole lot more interesting for you. And for the rest of us, let's hope that common sense prevails and this ruling is seen for what it truly is: a recipe for pandemonium.
